Official Washington is holding its collective breath once again.

George W. Bush didn’t issue any new pardons or signing statements. We haven’t thwarted another terrorist attack (assuming, of course, that we’ve ever thwarted any in the first place) and the bombers are not headed for Iran…yet.

No, the whispers in the cloakrooms of Capitol Hill and over drinks in the bar at The Willard Hotel concern who’s name may or may not be on Deborah Jeane Palfrey’s phone list – the list that shows who did or did not use her ring of high price prostitutes.

Palfrey, better known as the DC Madam, ran a lucrative whorehouse that provided “escorts” to the high and mighty of Washington. Her list, it is said, contains 15,000 names of high-profile Washington types who used the services of her ladies of the evening.

The feds fought like hell to keep the list secret, winning a temporary restraining order earlier but the judge lifted that order this week, saying the government had not supplied any compelling reason to keep the list secret.

According to sources, the Bush Administration ordered the Justice Department to do everything in its power to keep the list under court seal because a number of high ranking presidential appointees are on the list – others besides Ambassador Randall L. Tobias, who resigned after revelations that he used the girls gone wild from Palfrey’s service.

Another rabid right-winger, Washington Times columnist Harlan Ullman, who is part of the conservative Center for Strategic and International Studies, made the list as well.

Who’s next? Until the list is actually released, all we can do is speculate and speculation is always a lot of fun.

I love it whenever any elected or appointed official gets caught with his Johnson sticking in an orifice where it doesn’t belong but the joy is unbounded when that Johnson belongs to a member of the self-righteous right-wing.

They, after all, are the ones who preach ad infinitum about the evils of sin and claim to be better than the rest of us immoral cretins.

A newly-elected (or selected depending on which conspiracy theory you believe) George W. Bush promised “the most ethical administration in history.” Instead he gave America the most scandal-ridden, corrupt Presidency of modern times.

Newt Gingrich decried the adultery of President Bill Clinton while he dorked an willing House employee behind his wife’s back. Republican conservative Dan Burton, chairman of the committee investigating Clinton, was himself under investigation for putting his mistress on both his Congressional office and campaign payrolls.

One can argue that what any of these folks do behind closed doors is their own business and that we shouldn’t give a damn who’s screwing whom but when those same folks hold themselves up as paragons of virtue they deserve to be outed as shameless, immoral hypocrites.

Washington has long been a corrupt, putrid, toxic cesspool where slime rises to the top. That’s why Deborah Jeane Palfrey’s high-priced whores fit right in and the criminal enterprise known as the administration of George W. Bush is using the power of the federal government to try and suppress the truth.

At one time, the key to success in Washington was “who you know.”

It should be “who you blow.”

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