Republicans and Their Porno King & Queen

According to some propaganda that showed up in the mailbox recently from the Republican National Committee, the GOP is “reaching out” to new constituencies in an effort to “broaden their base.”

Saw evidence of that this week when news broke that porn star Mary Carey will attend the June 14th President’s Dinner sponsored by the National Republican Congressional Committee.

Carey, an unsuccessful GOP candidate for governor in the California recall election, will attend the dinner with her boss, LA porno king Mark Kulkis, president of Kick Ass Pictures. Kulkis, a major contributor to GOP political circles, shelled out big bucks to attend the dinner and paid for a private meeting with President George W. Bush’s top gun, Karl Rove.

“I’m honored to be invited to this event,” Kulkis told Adult Industry News. “Republicans bill themselves as the pro-business party. Well, you won’t find a group of people more pro-business than pornographers. We contributed over $10 billion to the national economy last year.”

Carey says she is “especially looking forward to meeting Karl Rove, Smart men like him are so sexy. I know that he’s against gay marriage, but I think I can convince him that a little girl-on-girl action now and then isn’t so bad!”

According to Adult Industry News, Kulkis serves as an “honorary chairman” on the NRCC’s Business Advisory Council, a position big-dollar contributors receive for writing out big checks. I called the NRCC to ask if this was so and they wouldn’t confirm or deny Kulkis’s membership on the council or whether or not he would, in fact, be attending the dinner in June.

It would be fitting if a porno producer managed to buy his way into the Republican Inner Circle where wealth, not character, has been the only criteria for admission. Others who have attended such big bucks GOP dinners include chief Enron crook Ken Lay, junk bond kind (and ex-con) Michael Milkin and dozens of others who have done, or are doing, time in state and federal pens. The Democrats offer perks to their big bucks donors as well, although when you don’t control either the White House or Congress you don’t have that much to offer and they have been red-faced in the past when a high-dollar contributor turned out to be unsavory. Politics, by its nature, attracts people who are used to paying bribes for favors.

But Republicans are especially hypocritical when it comes to talking about morality and family values and then looking the other way when someone hands over cash. A few years back, preacher Pat Robertson, head of the Christian Broadcasting Network and a chief crusader for “decency in America,” had to admit his company leased one of its satellite transponders to the Playboy Channel.

“There is the Lord’s work,” Robertson said, “and there is business.”

In other words, you can preach morality all you want but you don’t have to practice it when money’s involved.

Or maybe Republicans are just kinkier than we thought. Maybe Laura Bush wears nipple rings with elephants on them and has a tattoo on her butt that says “Dubya’s bitch.”

We already know the Bush twins are party girls. The only thing left is to find out Lynne Cheney is into leather and whips. Maybe that’s why Dick has a bum heart.