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Ten reasons NOT to read Capitol Hill Blue

By Hal Brown
October 12, 2009

1) You’re already depressed enough about things in your personal life that you can’t control.

2) Some of Doug’s titles are such downers that you can’t bring yourself to read the column, “Losing America” for example. Trust me. I read it and now I have all I can do to keep from having a second glass of pinot noir.

3) The other columnists, myself included, seem to have refined kvetching to an internet version of graffiti.

4) There are too many compound sentences with big words which tax your brain.

5) You’d rather read about Oprah’s diet-busting visit to the Texas State Fair.

6) You think that the only polls that mean anything are those having to do with sports.

7) Huffington Post is better because it has entertainment and comedy sections.

8) The Reader Rant forum reminds you of the debate club that snubbed you in high school until you beat the crap out of their president.

9) The commenters on the columns remind you of the witnesses who testified against you in my assault and battery trial.

10) Doug Thompson reminds you of the warden of Attica.

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10 Responses to Ten reasons NOT to read Capitol Hill Blue

  1. bogofree

    October 13, 2009 at 9:12 pm

    Yeah…I’ve seen you in those Sox, Hal.

  2. almandine

    October 13, 2009 at 9:41 pm

    I can’t quit chuckling…

  3. woody188

    October 12, 2009 at 10:34 pm

    11. Because you prefer your news “light and fluffy,” just like your eggs.

    12. You prefer to believe you live in a democratic republic instead of a fascist plutocracy.

    13. You are Illuminati and already know what is going on because you helped plan it.

    14. You get all your political news from Doonesbury.

    15. Politics? UGH! How boring!

  4. Hal Brown

    October 13, 2009 at 6:50 am

    Fantastic 11-15…
    Anybody have any more?

    I like 13 the best of the five.

  5. Carl Nemo

    October 12, 2009 at 10:57 pm

    ROTF…:))))…!

    Carl Nemo **==

  6. bogofree

    October 13, 2009 at 4:05 pm

    You have no section of the Red Sox – now that is depressing.

  7. Hal Brown

    October 13, 2009 at 4:13 pm

    Only clowns and communists wear red socks.

  8. DejaVuAllOver

    October 15, 2009 at 4:58 pm

    16.) You gotta get some work done and the truth isn’t likely to make you a better corporate soldier.

    17.) You’re a songwriter who only writes love songs and never protest songs.

    18.) You already have high blood pressure.

    19.) You’ve just been drafted, subpoenaed by the IRS or sent to Gitmo.

    20.) You think Milton Friedman and Paul Wolfowitz were/are nice guys.

    OK…..

    OK…..

  9. bryan mcclellan

    October 15, 2009 at 8:21 pm

    21.) I’m dead?

    22.) I like to hear myself think I already thunk.

    23.) I’m overly inadequately informed?

    24.) I’m worried about the hammers ankle.

    25.) I’m too busy looking through my cracked windshield hoping the fog will dissipate.

  10. Warren

    October 16, 2009 at 10:16 pm

    26.) You’ve gone off your Prozac.
    27.) You can find no humor in the absurdity of our world.
    28.) You prefer discussions where everyone thinks the same way. Different viewpoints and opinions are a drag, and anyone who has a viewpoint different from yours is a moron anyway.
    29.) You prefer swearing, verbal assault and personal attack. After all, that’s the real world we live in, right?

    —W—

  11. ekaton

    October 21, 2009 at 12:34 pm

    30. The goddamn format keeps changing constantly and it is totally needless and annoying for this to be so — so much that it undoubtedly drives potential readers away.

    DOUG! PLEASE! Settle on ONE format for awhile. PLEASE!

    Kent Shaw

  12. Jonnan

    October 19, 2009 at 6:29 pm

    Be fair – more to the point, huffington post has pictures of fit celebrities *amongst* the more important and occasionally useful blogs.

    They can be *just* as depressing as some of the stuff here, but I get to look at pictures of Halle Berry too. And believe me, thinking about the fact that, if I had had money in May, I could have gotten a 66% return on an investment, I need to look at pictures of Halle Berry in form fitting clothing every so often.

    – Jonnan

    It wasn’t me, it was my evil twin Skippy!

    Wait, no, I *am* the evil twin Skippy . . .

  13. almandine

    October 27, 2009 at 9:06 pm

    so google halle berry and keep it in your pants.

  14. Doug Thompson

    October 21, 2009 at 12:54 pm

    As I explained in another thread, the coding in the new format caused problems and crashed the database on Monday. I had to return to the old format.

    This was the second time I had tried to make the new format work. It didn’t so I’m back to where we started.

    Our goal is always to keep the format fresh and present readers with a design that is both pleasing and easy to use.

    Sorry you consider it a “goddamned” format. Do you want to try running this web site for a while? All you need to do is get up at 4 a.m. every day for the first round of updates, spend several hours a day trying to keep spam blog posts and comments under control and lose several thousand dollars a year while doing so.

  15. Hal Brown

    October 21, 2009 at 5:10 pm

    If you have a wide screen monitor check out what The Washington Post just did to their home page.

    In the format Doug had trouble with he had to manually re-do the html code of all of one of my columns because the way I’d been submitting them all along didn’t work.

  16. ekaton

    October 21, 2009 at 6:39 pm

    Sorry. Goddamn was definitely out of line. Just frustration is all. Missed your earlier explanation. Still a great website. And NOOOO, I do NOT want to try to run the site — ummmm… unless you’re offering me a job???? grin. Yeah, I saw the losing money comment. A labor of love…

    Kent Shaw

  17. Warren

    October 22, 2009 at 12:20 am

    Just be glad Ol’ Fumblefingers hasn’t blown the CMS and database away (yet)!

    Seriously, this is a darned good website for what I presume is the minimal budget available to create and maintain it. The underpinnings are really quite complex – apparently a Drupal content management system riding on a MYSQL database of all of our years of f̶o̶o̶l̶i̶s̶h̶ ̶d̶r̶i̶v̶e̶l̶ profound insight. On top of all that is the artistic layout and navigation, which looks good and functions well.

    My compliments to you, Doug.

    —W—

  18. Carl Nemo

    October 28, 2009 at 12:10 am

    I like the format and I’ve sent Doug emails to this effect. Seemingly he’s attempting to give his site a columnar newspaper appearance. I like it! : ) My only suggestion is not have the color red in the site title. It looks corny to me with the ol’ red white blue. To me it’s “Capitol Hill Blue”, with the color blue intimating scandal; ie., the dirt that one can find on “K” street, in Congress and the White House itself.

    No “red” please, it seems far too patriotic in these trying times of having to joust with criminality in high places. It’s all black and blue to bad or worse, all the time for “We the people”. These crimpols deserve no quarter when it comes to exposing their duplicity and criminal behavior…!

    Hopefully we won’t have to escalate to the level of “blood red” to save our collective bacon, although I have my doubts.

    Go Capitol Hill “Blue”…ooraH!

    Carl Nemo **==